I am a typical mother who gave birth late. Although I am very happy to raise my baby, I still struggle to nurse, change diapers and sleep in the middle of the night in my 30s. Therefore, whenever I see other people’s children can already get soy sauce, I am really envious: it’s good to have a baby early. Look, I am relieved now!
In fact, a few years ago, I didn’t think so at all. At that time, I saw my peers suffering in the feather of marriage and raising babies. I was often glad that I could sleep until I woke up naturally on weekends, wander in the hutongs of literature and art, read miscellaneous books, and take a walk-and-go trip.
At that time, my elders often advised me to give birth early while I was young, recover quickly after giving birth, and the old man was in good health, so I could help bring the baby with me. But my husband and I always feel that we haven’t played enough and haven’t prepared ourselves to be parents, so we want to play for two more years and do more accumulation for our children’s future. Think about it all makes sense, so we are entangled. So, today we will talk to you, early birth and late birth, which is better and where is the difference?
Different physical conditions of 25-year-olds and 35-year-olds
Only from a physiological point of view, 25-year-old women are more likely to conceive, give birth more smoothly, recover faster after delivery, and have fewer birth defects. 35-year-old women have great difficulties in preparing for pregnancy. In order to avoid the defects of the baby and ensure the health of the parturient, more examinations are done during pregnancy, more health matters need to be paid attention to, and the physical recovery after delivery is relatively slow.
I have a best friend who has been pregnant for three years and has not succeeded. She has also done formal examination. She has not pulled down her prayer for God and Buddha. She is unable to conceive. She once sighed with emotion that many young girls around the age of 20 have had several abortions. It is so difficult for me to want children. It is really dry death and waterlogging death.
With the progress of medicine, the physical condition corresponding to age is no longer the only consideration when giving birth to a baby. Many women decide to have children or have a second child after the age of 35. Others, such as Xu Jinglei, have frozen their eggs in advance and are waiting for pregnancy when the time is ripe in the future.
Different Energy and Economic Conditions of Raising Children
There is a saying circulating in every delivery room: “Enjoy the last leisurely time, and when the baby is born and the goods are unloaded, it will never be stuffed back.” Unless you just give birth and don’t care about raising, you will have to face not only the problem of “when to give birth”, but also a series of sequels of “when to raise”.
Economic basis
Although “the poor are poor and the rich are rich”, which mother does not hold her children in her palm? At the age of 25, he had just worked for a few years and even entered the society after finishing his master’s degree. Especially for the young people floating in big cities, he was still reluctant to support himself, and he was unable to support his children. At the age of 35, there will be little success in your career, because your work ability and contacts become irreplaceable in the company. It will be relatively easier financially to raise children at this time:
There are many conflicts between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law in Spend money, hire the most expensive nanny, and enter the best Yuezi club!
Is it too much trouble for children to see a doctor? Spend money, go to the best hospital, find the best doctor!
There are many problems with the old man taking the baby? Spending money, asking for a child-rearing sister-in-law, or taking care of her for a few years before working.
Psychological maturity
When you were 25 years old, you gave birth to a baby before you were psychologically ready. It happens that the husband is also young. If you become irritable in the face of the separation anxiety of your child at the age of 1, the rebellious period at the age of 2 is easy to start work, and the “100,000 whys” at the age of 3 lack patience, you can’t contain your temper or even argue with each other in the face of the common slowness, repetition and constant testing of children.
At the age of 35, you experienced the sharpening of your career and society, and slowly learned to be lenient to others. It is no longer a temper that explodes at the touch. At this time, raising children again may be relatively calm and patient. The love you express to your children can also cultivate a good parent-child relationship and promote the healthy growth of your children.
However, some people like their children very much in their 20s, know how to communicate with them in a timely and effective manner, and are full of patience most of the time, so they don’t have to wait until they are in their 30s. After all, some people have experienced in society for ten years and go home with a violent temper. On the contrary, the child’s angelic smile can melt his anger. For example, Jasper slowly eliminated Chen Xiaochun’s lion roar.
The degree of help of the elderly
At the age of 25, the old man is still young and can help take care of you and the children. Even if you hire another nanny to work, it is reassuring to have the old man watching the nanny at home.
When a 35-year-old baby is born, the old man may also need to be taken care of. At this time, it is really “old at the top and young at the bottom”. Both sides need to be taken care of, and the energy involved is even greater.
Children are not as old as themselves.
Parents who are younger than their children in age have the energy and physical strength to take care of their children. Children who go out and run or slide on scooters can also play with their children, and fathers can even call each other brothers with their children.
If the age difference is relatively large, it is really more difficult in terms of physical strength and energy. Before, my classmate was the old son of his family. When we went to primary school, his father was already 60 years old. All the classmates in the class called his father “Grandpa”. The atmosphere was a little awkward.
Summary
25-year-old baby, or 35-year-old baby, in fact, there is no absolute good and bad. When to give birth to a baby is better, in fact, there is no standard answer. It can only be said that with the progress of science and technology, the progress of social concepts, women have more and more choices.
The answer to this question does not even depend on whether you are ready or not, but the key lies in your ability to raise children with a sense of responsibility, to think of corresponding solutions according to your actual physical condition, family condition and economic condition, and to persist in learning and practicing knowledge of raising children.