After taking maternity leave, giving the children to the elderly during the day is the [operation mode] of the vast majority of dual-employee families in China.
However, as the little guys grow up, [taking care of children] is no longer as simple as taking care of food, drink and scatter. Babies gradually understand words, can imitate and have their own ideas. At this time, [teaching] and [raising] become as important.
Perhaps neither Bao’s parents nor the old people in the family realized that the following six words should be said to their children.
1. Hit the table, who told it to hurt us
No matter how careful you are, babies will always fall and bump. After [Mao] ([Burst]), your baby’s reaction is what?
One possibility is this:
[Wow…] The baby wailed loudly.
[Hit the table (floor), who told it to hurt us! The baby does not cry, does not cry! ]
Slowly, the child’s crying gradually stopped and continued to play.
On the surface, this can appease children’s emotions, but it may lead to a cognitive misunderstanding: as long as you are injured, it is someone else’s fault.
In fact, if the child really hurts, crying is only a temporary emotional catharsis, and [hugging] is good. Moreover, there is no conflict between appeasement and telling the truth.
Perhaps, to say bluntly to the children [we should pay attention to the road in the future, it will not be easy to fall/hit] is the real protection.
2. Don’t tell your mom/dad/grandma he won’t let you eat
If the child is noisy or unhappy, the most worry-free way is to give them what they want, such as a can of potato chips.
Under this circumstance, the child was immediately happy-it was really a worry to take her.
[Instigator] At this time, the following sentence often comes:
[Don’t tell your mother/father/grandmother that he won’t let you eat.]
Snacks are not impossible to eat, but only limited. It makes sense not to eat more:
-
A child, stomach capacity is limited, eating snacks will naturally affect eating dinner, nutrition is difficult to balance;
-
[Snacks] are usually high in calories and fat, and eating too much is easy to cause obesity.
-
[Snacks] Generally, salt and sugar are added harshly. When you are young, you learn to have heavy tastes. When you grow up, you will have high blood pressure directly?
If you occasionally learn that your family/friends have secretly done such things, be sure to tell them in good faith: don’t do it again.
After knowing, don’t be too busy punishing children.
3. Such a young child understands what
One day when I was shopping in the supermarket, I suddenly heard the sound of broken glass.
I saw a mother seriously accusing a 3-year-old boy:
[Mom told you, this is wine, children can’t eat it, don’t take it. Now you have broken it, you have to compensate.]
Seeing the little boy’s eyes with tears of fear, the grandmother immediately interrupted:
[Such a young child understands what, this bottle is already too heavy.]
[Mom, Xiao Bao is going to kindergarten. He can understand all this. We have to be honest with him. He broke this bottle of wine. We can’t let him develop the character of evading responsibility just because he is still young.]
At that moment, I praised the mother’s words in my heart.
4. Your mother/father/grandmother is gone, and you are not needed.
When my son was one or two years old, I tried to let him stay at my grandmother’s house two nights a week to relieve the double pressure on my husband and me.
Unexpectedly, one night when I called before going to bed, my son cried for his mother at the other end of the phone.
My mother said that several neighbors teased him during the day and said to him, “Your mother is gone, don’t want you], and the little fellow turned red with tears on the spot.
I hurriedly taught her: Tell those people not to say so, children will be sad and believe it.
I think we should not wantonly destroy children’s innocence and trust. Especially when the mother is absent or cannot see the mother, we should not cheat the child on the grounds of [fun and lively atmosphere].
5. If you … again, the police will come to arrest you.
[Mom, are the police bad people? ]
[Why do you ask? Of course the police uncle is a good man.]
[So, if I don’t obey, will the police come to arrest me? ]
Ask around, oh, it’s the neighbors who did it during the day again.
Many people think that scaring and threatening children will allow them to obey the rules and not cause troubles. However, slowly, such people will lose their credit in their children’s hearts and [always talk nonsense].
What if one day, children really meet bad people and need help from the police uncle, but they are afraid that the police uncle will take them away?
6. We will not love you when my younger brother/sister is born.
Since last year, the tide of second children has become hotter and hotter. I am also a little moved, so I lurk in the group of second-child mothers.
Unexpectedly, seeing many mothers surprised to find that Dabao’s behavior began to become abnormal, such as crying more and behavior degeneration, after the family or themselves inadvertently said such words as “you are disobedient, when our younger brother/sister is born, we all love him and don’t love you”.
I think, if I want to have a second child in the future, I must have a good communication with Dabao in advance and tell him that when the baby in my belly is born, he will be the elder brother and my mother will need his help in many places. Mother and father may love him and the baby in different ways, but no matter whether he is better or the baby is better, mother and father will always love him as before.
It is easier to have children than to raise them. Oh, no, it is not easy to have children either. There are no born perfect parents, but we can all do better than before ~