Not long ago, when I asked what contraceptive measures were available in a college class, a 22-year-old suddenly stood up and said, “I can’t listen any more, you are spreading obscenity! ] Without my response, I saw him scold the deskmate girl who was smiling secretly beside him: “Laugh at what, I CNM!” ]
At that moment, I felt that 10,000 grass mud horses galloped past in my heart, and the screen was full of muffled barrages.
Sex was scolded and talked about reasonably and scientifically, but it became obscene? !
Is what hindering us?
No matter teachers or parents, when giving their children sex education, the saddest level is their own [adult shame].
Some parents told me that when giving sex education to their children, the words [male penis enters female vagina] were really hard to say.
I asked him, in this sentence, is what’s word making you feel difficult?
He said it was [penis] and [vagina], and asked me if I could tell the child that it was [penis entering small stamens]. Forgive me for inadvertently filling up the picture of [a lump of golden hairy and a lump of pink flowers intertwined].
The world of children is not as complicated as you think.
I often hear the saying: the child is still young, I’m afraid he can’t accept it.
This is actually an adult putting the [colorful] world of his own on the [colorful] world of children. In children’s world, green is green, it can be trees, grass, but not wine bottles; Red is red. It can be flowers or birds, but it is not a red light district.
After breaking through their sense of shame, many parents talk generously about sex with their children, but the results are very good.
Sex education, don’t use obscure words
Some people will say, the second best thing to do is to settle for it. I can’t give the scientific name, so I can use references. When we were young, adults taught us the same thing.
This approach is risky.
I have a friend who downloaded Stephen Chow’s Kung Fu on the Internet when she was in high school. When she started the movie, it was a Japanese high-definition code-free action movie. In the movie, the male actor asked the female actor, “Do you want to eat sausage?” ] The woman said with her head in her head: “Yes.” The man then took out his genitals… … …
At that time, she was still puzzled by such lovely questions as [Xiangfei and Meng Dan have already kissed, why are they still virgins]. For a long time, she did not dare to look directly at the fragrant [barbecue sausage] on the streets, and even felt nauseous.
When we use words such as [banana] [cucumber] [black fungus] [mushroom] [little tintin] [little steamed bun] to refer to private organs, and words such as [old man’s cart] [puff snow cake] [sea and sky feast] to refer to sexual behavior, these words are given the meaning of [sex].
Shame, on the contrary, makes our daily life more [full of sexual flavor]. We tried to solve shame in a [euphemistic way], but in the end the world was filled with more sexual cues, sexual associations and sexual temptations.
For adults, this may be a [interest] or even a certain culture, but from the perspective of sex education, it runs counter to our goal.
If you don’t talk, others will talk to the children.
There is also a voice that when the child grows up, he will naturally understand and need not deliberately do what [sex education]. I am also afraid that if I make a mistake, I will lead the child astray.
Don’t talk, don’t need to talk, don’t talk, don’t dare to talk, don’t talk, don’t talk.
However, no matter what kind of [not to talk about], it cannot prevent children from obtaining sex-related information in the information age.
The simplest sex-related information is actually foul language. How many of the Chinese foul language are not related to sex? Not only is it related, it is also full of aggression, especially humiliation to women.
I was bored. Some people can open their mouths to swear in front of their children, so that they can read a few scientific nouns. However, it is uncomfortable. What kind of noise is it to make?
If you don’t talk about it, naturally someone else will talk to him. If you take the initiative to talk about it, you can also know that the child is thinking about what. If you give up this opportunity to other ways, you can’t do it in what.
It is forbidden to talk about sex, which cannot solve the problem.
As for those ideas and practices that say it is forbidden to talk about sex with children, to watch erotic films, and to prohibit children from this and that, I generally disdain to pay attention.
Why?
Because prohibition itself is a kind of production.
Some studies in sex sociology have pointed out that in a society, if there is a place to suppress sex, there must be another outlet to release sex.
In medieval Europe, when the church needed to prohibit people’s certain sexual behaviors, it had to describe such prohibited behaviors to make people understand that what could not do it.
Similarly, if the Government prohibits people from watching erotic films, what must be defined as erotic films in its ban documents. Therefore, in order to let more people know about the ban, it is necessary to use various channels to issue the ban. However, in this process, more people actually know about erotic films.
Besides, for the youth group, the ban is a kind of temptation. Some young children do not take any safety measures before tasting the forbidden fruit, and eventually hurt others and themselves because of curiosity and ignorance.
If you want to give your child a good sex education, the first step is desensitization.
Adults should desensitize first!
The first step in desensitization is to say scientific terms related to sex gracefully.
Please read to me aloud:
Vagina, penis, testis, uterus, ovary
Menstruation, spermatorrhea, leucorrhea, orgasm
Sexual intercourse, condoms, contraceptives, masturbation
Sexual fantasies, sexual invitations, sexual harassment, sexual assault