On Women’s Day this year, I made a decision: abandon the chest pad.
When I say chest pad, I don’t mean the thick sponge pad in the bra, but a small cotton disc with a diameter of 5-6 centimeters used to prevent bumps.
Why did I need to use chest pads before? Because apart from sports bra, I only wear one kind of underwear, that is, only a thin layer of lace style. When buying this kind of underwear, the shopping guide will ask me very sweetly: “do you need a chest pad?” ]
As for mould cups, adjustment underwear, gathering underwear, etc., I never wanted to wear them. Weird colors, old-fashioned patterns, a belt half the width of the back, five or six rows of buttons… ugly like this, not to mention how miserable the chest looks when it is squeezed together. It is normal for the chest to expand slightly in a natural state. What is it to squeeze out of an artificial ditch?
How to successfully disguise yourself as a flat chest?
I didn’t completely abandon my underwear and go out in a vacuum like some feminist friends around me. The reason is the same as the reason why I only wear thin underwear: my chest is big.
I have big breasts. Whenever I say these three words, the expression I often face is surprise. In fact, the following three scenes often appear in my life.
Scene 1: When buying underwear, the guide glanced at my chest and brought me a 75B. I corrected: [Please give me 70D.] They will come in when I try on underwear and believe it only after seeing it is believing, [you are so thin, I really can’t see it.]
Scene 2: Talking about chest size with friends, if I mention that I am a D Cup, it is usually questioned. What I didn’t say was that when I was still a meat player in adolescence, my size was 70E.
Scene 3: Send photos in the circle of friends. If you just wear cool or tight clothes, there will always be one or two people commenting that [your chest is so big].
There are many such things, and I will no longer explain them. In fact, I guess there are two reasons for this misunderstanding:
-
My chest circumference is just ordinary, only because the skeleton is small and the lower circumference is small, the Cup is relatively large. In fact, visually, 70D may look similar to 80B.
-
For nearly ten years, I have disguised myself as a flat chest. Facts have proved that my pretense is not a failure.
It is not difficult to disguise as a flat chest, but it requires two prerequisites: a small and thin skeleton. Only two steps need to be taken to perfectly disguise:
-
Wear sports lingerie;
-
Wear less tight clothes.
Done.
Why would I disguise my breasts?
Why do I always hide my femininity? In the past few years, I didn’t think much about this problem. I simply thought that I liked to look neutral at that time, just out of an aesthetic preference. In those years of puberty, both men and women, I liked thin, young and vague faces and bodies, so I also adjusted myself in this direction.
It has been last year to think about this problem again. Looking back on why those years were disguised as flat chests, I will not simply and roughly attribute the reason to [aesthetic preference], but to the result of the comprehensive effect of many parties.
1. Parents’ Lack of Sex Education
Although my parents gave me a rather relaxed growth environment and great support, I made up for the problem of sex education by myself.
When I was a child, whenever there was a kissing scene on TV, my parents’ attitude was to pretend not to see it. They will not prevent me from watching, but they have never guided me.
Naturally, the little knowledge in biology class could not satisfy me, so in the three years between the ages of 13 and 15, I completed my sex education in two ways: checking information online after my parents slept, and Xiao Huang Man.
The little Huang Man I saw in those days was mainly the work of Xintiao Zhenyou. From my current point of view, Xintiao Zhenyou’s cartoon is about the Japanese version of “Fifty Shades of Grey”, full of Marisol flavor of “domineering president falling in love with me”.
2. A perfunctory first underwear
My mother didn’t care about my chest development, and I bought my first underwear very hastily.
Before the second day of the junior high school, like most girls of the same age, my underwear was just a small vest. In the second year of the junior high school, my mother took me to buy the first underwear (it seemed to me at that time [adult style]), which was just a small shop on the street. The salesperson glanced at me, took out a pure white underwear for my mother, and bought it without trying it on. The whole journey took less than five minutes.
The next day I went to school wearing this underwear, and the whole person was extremely uncomfortable. It was summer at that time, and I was very worried that the thin clothes would reveal the traces of underwear. That day in PE class, a good girl slapped me on the back and touched the belt of my underwear. She immediately shouted, “XX She is wearing a bra!” ]
This may be the most embarrassing moment of my entire adolescence.
3. Face the rapid development of the chest alone.
Although I started to wear [adult-style] underwear on the second day of the junior high school, my chest actually developed quite late and was still flat when I graduated from junior high school.
When I really started to grow fast, I had already started to live in high school. At the age of 15, I was far away from my family and faced with growing breasts. I didn’t know who to discuss with or where to buy suitable underwear. There were few underwear under 200 yuan in the shopping mall, which was too expensive for a high school student.
Out of shyness, instead of signaling for help to my parents or classmates, I tried to hide my breasts so that they would not attract attention. Until my second year of high school, I finally found an underwear store with the right style and price, thus ending the history of wearing inappropriate underwear.
After college, I noticed that girls with big breasts are always more likely to be hunchback. I am also hunchback, thinking of the 15-year-old when I tried to cover my chest, and guessing that there may be a subtle connection between the size of a girl’s chest and the time of chest development and whether she is hunchback.
I finally accepted my body
The inconsistency between aesthetic preferences and my physical characteristics is indeed one of the reasons for my flat chest disguise. It was not until last year that my aesthetics really changed to appreciate the strong, powerful and sexually attractive human body when I started to exercise.
After the aesthetic change, my appearance has also changed greatly: I am stronger than before by two circles, gain 5 kg weight and have a little muscle.
From the age of 15 to the age of 25, this problem of body cognition and identity that has troubled me for ten years has finally come to an end for the time being. Due to lack of exercise, my body fat rate has increased by 3 percentage points this winter, but my psychology is relaxed, and I finally fully accept this pair of my only body.