Suddenly one day, you find in despair:
My husband began to think you were wordy and there was no surprise on the birthday festival. My mother-in-law began to tell you what to do. There are fewer and fewer friends who ask you to have a cup of coffee together… … …
You also no longer pay attention to where to travel, ysl lipstick has a what color number, buy a what bag…
Open your mouth and shut up is [my baby…]
It seems that from the night of marriage, you have become an accessory to the family. However, the husband is getting colder and colder, the children are disobedient, and the old man is always pointing fingers behind his back.
How did you become an accessory step by step?
1. Stop focusing on appearance
Man: [Why do you start not to dress up at all and don’t care about your image as long as you become mothers? ]
Woman: [Because it is good to take care of the children! I don’t have enough sleep. How can I dress up? ] Besides, who do you want to dress up for?
After becoming a mother, most women have taken on most of the responsibility of care and training actively (or passively). Their long-term energy overdraft has exhausted their body and mind, and they no longer have their own personal time and space.
Mothers really don’t have to carry it all by themselves, Let Dad also share the responsibility of taking the baby, set aside some time of his own, and make good use of himself, even if it is a beauty sleep. To integrate into your circle of colleagues and friends, to see the world. Can’t wait until you travel, you still wear pullovers and carry sacks of mommy bags behind your handsome young husband?
2. Countless [sorrow]
Man: [Why do you have such a bad temper now? You always get so angry with children.]
Old Man: [Ouch, the child is still so young, do you worry all day about the meaning of what in the school district? Children and grandchildren have their own blessings.]
In the month, you are not worried about enough milk. Later, you are worried about the slow walking of your children. Later, you begin to worry about educational resources and even various things in the future. In short, one [sorrow] is interspersed with most of your life.
However, [sorrow] will only make you tired physically and mentally, but for the things you worry about, there is what.
3. Be busy with trivial things and stop studying.
When we become mothers, the trap we are most likely to fall into is to lose ourselves.
You have become the XX mother in everyone’s mouth, devoting all your heart to your children. The dispersion of your energy makes you no longer as efficient, powerful and innovative in your work as before, and even loses the esteem of your leaders.
However, as an adult, we should tell ourselves with reason that no matter in the what stage, we need to keep learning about our career and life. The progress may slow down, but we should never stop.
Therefore, if you have nothing to do, you can read books. If you can’t, it is also good to subscribe to several high-quality public numbers and turn them over every day, so as to keep your vision and knowledge base constantly updated.
Of course, if you don’t want to be inexplicably devalued, maybe you can…
Do the Quadripartite Quadripartite of Confidence
1. Less sun exposure and more study
In the first year of giving birth to a child, I was also a child basker. At the beginning, friends in the circle of friends would give me some praise and comment on a few words of praise. Slowly, only those mothers insisted on giving me some praise.
Slowly, I began to search for the meaning of my photos, is it to get praise from others or to record myself? If it is the latter, why can’t it be kept in the photo album?
The following year, I spent most of my time basking in the sun on my own study. I not only promised to read a book every week, but also gradually became a baking expert. As far as I was concerned, reading enabled me to ensure a positive state of continuous learning and rising. Baking also enabled the whole family to eat healthier cakes, which was simply to achieve more with one stroke.
In addition, my continuous study has also exerted a subtle influence on my son. When I pick up the book in my hand, my son will follow suit. When I started kneading dough and beating eggs, my son offered to participate together. It is really a very happy thing to take care of children while growing up.
2. Less Complaining, More Planning
[Why is it that other people’s mother-in-law is so capable and the good baby she brings can do the housework in such an orderly way? ]
[Why is the husband of other people’s family so strong in earning money? If I don’t have the trouble of mortgage, I can certainly cultivate my children better.]
[Why did I give birth in a muddle-headed way in those days and now even my career development has been disrupted? ]
It is a person’s biggest problem to attribute all the problems to others.
I also had a period of postpartum years full of complaints and dissatisfaction with the status quo.
Later, I found that the vast majority of complaints can actually be solved with money. If you have money, you can hire a gold medal sister-in-law, you will not complain that your mother-in-law does not help you take care of your baby, nor will you complain that your husband does not earn enough, nor will you regret having a baby.
Moreover, complaining itself is of no practical use. It will only make you full of negative energy and keep close people away from you.
It is better to plan your career and make money from now on.
3. Less laziness and more fitness
< < Beijing Love Story > > The [cheated] wife Lei Zhang is unkempt, and the only few scenes are also plain images of squatting on the floor and trying to clean the floor. It truly reflects the appearance of my first year of giving birth.
No matter how busy you are, you have to squeeze out 30 minutes of fitness time every day. Whether you go to the gym or practice at home, you can manage your body simply and efficiently.
For the first five minutes, you will feel very difficult, but after you get through it, you will be able to sweat profusely and enjoy the full sense of vitality.
Keep good fitness habits so that you will no longer fear the growth of age. A good complexion is enough to increase your self-confidence. At the same time, good appearance and makeup will make you walk more confidently.
Therefore, the more self-disciplined, the happier.
4. Less Anxiety, More Work
The child is 2 centimeters shorter than the standard online data, so you can’t sleep all night.
When children from friends’ families with similar incomes enter the best kindergartens in the city, you begin to feel uneasy.
Two years ago, my apprentice in my work unit successfully changed jobs last month to become XX director of a listed company. Do you feel wronged and uneasy, thanks to what? Why?
Many things in the world that are superior to others are achieved by others who have made efforts behind their backs that you cannot see. Therefore, there is no need to worry, but should work hard.
Perhaps, let go of your husband/family’s misunderstanding of you, Settle your position in the whole society (instead of enlarging your mother’s identity indefinitely), and spend your untruthful strength on a positive and positive sunshine avenue. When you are loyal to your heart and make people feel calm and calm from the inside out, you can win your own day.