Women are born to worry too much. When faced with such [big events] as their children’s upcoming kindergarten, it is inevitable to do their homework early. From the neighborhood, circle of friends, mother group to start all kinds of inquiries and exchanges; To investigate kindergarten teachers, development history, background, students, food and prices; Repeated investigation, comparison, entanglement, hesitation… Even if the final determination of which flower falls, a few days before the real admission, will still suffer from insomnia and worry all night long.
Will children be bullied in kindergarten? Children’s self-care ability is not strong, will they not have enough to eat? Will you sleep without help covering the quilt? Will it be ignored by teachers and lead to inferiority? Will you cry dizzy…
In order to make teachers care more about their children, many parents may choose to quietly give teachers red envelopes. Is it possible to avoid these worries by giving teachers a gift/red envelope? Can you put 100 hearts in your children from now on?
Do you want to give gifts to teachers?
My college classmate J, who worked as a kindergarten teacher for more than two years, said: “I eat by myself and go to the toilet by myself. After these two major events are completed, there is basically nothing to worry about. Crying? Crying is normal, which shows that the child has feelings for you. But you must believe that the child’s adaptability is beyond your imagination.]
My good friend C, my son is in the middle class this year. She said: “Our children went to private schools and confiscated them several times. I also asked several good parents privately and confiscated them. Now this one is under strict control.”
Old friend Z: [My colleagues have given or not given, all of which are in the hope that their children will not be wronged in school, or that some children’s self-care ability is too poor. They think that teachers may work harder and give some gifts as a token of gratitude.]
Mother Group A: [Isn’t this bad wind caused by some parents? If they have all been sent, they will have to give more and less than those who have given more. Isn’t the teacher more concerned about the students who have given more? ]
Parents and friends, when you are thinking about whether to give gifts to teachers, have you tried to understand the teachers’ psychology? What the teacher really cares about is what?
Perhaps you can’t imagine that teachers can’t sleep all night in order to refuse gifts and red envelopes. If they accept them, they will feel uneasy and will be gossiped. If they don’t accept them, they will worry that parents want to think they don’t want to be responsible.
One of my cousins resigned after less than two years of preschool education. She said: “It’s too bitter. She is so tired that her throat is hoarse every day after work. My boyfriend laughed at me for being able to go to Adubie and whose hoarse voice is more charming. As soon as she gets home, Ge You lies down. Her family and friends don’t understand me. As for? Isn’t it just the last shift? I have received flowers from my parents and paintings drawn by my children, but I have never received red envelopes or all kinds of coupons, because I think this is my job and receiving red envelopes is outrageous.]
My teachers and friends all agree that, Compared with red envelopes, What they care more about is parents’ understanding and respect, Because even a little innocuous negligence-for example, the child went home and told the parents that he clearly answered the right question today and was not awarded a five-pointed star-some parents would make a big noise at school. Such an encounter really hit the teacher’s original enthusiastic heart deeply.
As a parent, before my son entered the park this year, I also experienced a deep ideological struggle alone on the issue of whether to give gifts or not.
Later, I found out that I wanted to give gifts to my teacher because this was the first time my son left me in a real sense and went to school alone. I didn’t have any relatives and friends in the school. I actually didn’t trust the teacher, but I also hoped to establish a good relationship with the teacher quickly, so I thought of giving gifts.
On the surface, I may say to my family that I am just worried that my children will be wronged and excluded. I just hope that teachers can pay attention to my children and ensure basic life and study in school. It is enough. But from the bottom of my heart, is this really the case? In fact, there is another voice at work in my heart: Why doesn’t the school even have a camera? Aren’t some schools able to watch the monitoring at any time? Why did the child cough a little when he came home today, was he infected or did he not cover the quilt when taking a nap?
Finally, when I brought the red envelope to the teacher, the teacher firmly refused my red envelope. She said to me gently but forcefully, “Don’t worry, we keep in touch at any time. I believe the child will soon fall in love with kindergarten.”
If you don’t give gifts, you can also use what methods to make good relations with teachers?
In many chats with my son and teacher, I gradually found that if you want to have a good relationship with the teacher, you may as well try the following points:
1. Teach Children [Life Skills]
Instead of worrying that kindergarten teachers will not take good care of our baby all day long, it is better to prepare the child for kindergarten in advance, teach the child the necessary skills to live independently in kindergarten, and help him adapt to kindergarten life quickly.
The necessary [survival skills] for kindergartens include:
(1) learn to express their ideas to others;
(2) Master basic life skills such as eating, going to the toilet, wearing and taking off shoes and socks;
(3) Adjust the work and rest time in advance to keep consistent with the kindergarten work and rest;
(4) Prepare the necessities of life and let children know their names and uses;
(5) Take the children to the kindergarten to visit in advance, get to know other children, so that the children are familiar with the living environment in the future.
2. 100% trust
Especially for the freshmen in the small class of kindergarten, the first week is a nightmare for teachers, parents and children. Fortunately, nightmares always end and waking up is light.
On the first day of admission, my son was the one who cried the most in the class. He cried all the time in the morning and was so tired that he fell asleep (the teacher fed him lunch after waking up). The teacher sent me WeChat at noon, telling me that the child cried very hard and suggested to pick it up half an hour earlier.
When he went to pick him up, he ran to me crazily, excited, excited, still with sadness and tears in his smile. At that moment, I almost collapsed, but three minutes later, my son told me joyfully about his life in kindergarten, which made me put down my guard and at the same time deeply understood how much energy the teacher had put in on this day.
For a week, My son has already adapted to school life. Every day he is sent to the park. No matter whether he is how’s mood, I will always be the one who turns his head and leaves with a smile. There are no special circumstances. I will never take the initiative to talk to the teacher for questioning, because the teacher will publish the children’s news, food and other information on the school’s APP every day. Because when I was picking up the children, I heard their hoarse voices and saw their exhausted faces.
Parents’ trust and nothing to disturb are the best support for their teaching work.
Perhaps because I have seen some reports of kindergarten abuse, many parents are always suspicious and unable to restrain their stirring [Conan heart]. However, calm down and think carefully, such vicious incidents are, after all, rare and mainly occur in some unqualified private institutions.
Therefore, instead of worrying about the sky, it is better to keep your eyes open when choosing a school and make the most rational choice based on the overall consideration of the kindergarten scale, staffing, kindergarten requirements and educational safety of preschool education institutions. Once the decision is made, you will be at ease to entrust your children to it. After all, it is true to communicate more with your children, and foolish ideas will only hurt you and embarrass your children and teachers.
3. Respect and recognition
In my opinion, A teacher is a respectable position. In their place, Your children are acquiring knowledge, gaining positive energy, broadening their horizons and gradually forming good living/rest habits every day. However, some parents think that I have spent money on kindergarten here. Teachers should take extra care of their children, All kinds of good welfare should belong to their own children, and they have never thought that their own practice will only make the relationship between children and teachers embarrassed and the relationship with classmates embarrassed. As a parent, do you really think that children can be taken care of in this way? Is it not to personally push children to specialization and marginalization?
For teachers, heartfelt respect and recognition can make them feel more gratified than flattery or gift bribery. All you need is a positive and supportive look and a sincere [hard work for your teacher]. All the exhaustion and injustice will disappear.
Respect is the most basic etiquette between people. Your recognition is also the greatest motivation for teachers to work.
Step 4: Cooperate
In addition to trust and respect, teachers often need the cooperation of our parents in their work at school.
For example, at the parents’ meeting last week, In order to make children fall in love with kindergarten life, Let each parent prepare a fruit for their children, and plan to let the children experience the game of squeezing juice and eating together. This idea is really good to me. When the teacher mentioned the need for parents in the class to voluntarily borrow two juicers, two mothers responded positively and were willing to contribute their own juicers.
A long time ago, I heard a teacher friend say that if the child is very good and sensible, then the teacher will certainly like it very much. On the contrary, if children are unruly, uncivilized, unreasonable and even like to offend people, teachers will also feel headache if they give more gifts. Therefore, family education is far more important than kindergarten.
Children’s admission does not mean that you are [freed] and [free]. Because the real backbone of children’s education is always us as parents. Therefore, it is better to spend more energy and thoughts on how to better and scientifically educate children than to rely on gifts to decompress themselves.