As parents, we certainly hope that we can often accompany our children. However, work is always too busy and there are always many things. Accompanying children seems to be a [luxury] thing.
Is companionship extravagant? Wrong!
1. Accompanying ≠ Spend a lot of time and energy
In fact, there is no absolute relationship between the company of children and the time and energy spent.
Many parents do spend a long time at home, but it is often their children who play with themselves. Parents do their own things nearby, such as work or playing with mobile phones, and do not accompany them well.
In this case, the child will even feel the apathy and indifference of adults and become the [high-demand baby] in adults’ eyes: short-tempered and difficult to appease.
On the other hand, the situation is to pay too much attention to children’s words and deeds and [take care of] children in every detail. In fact, this is not love but [control].
Children growing up in such an environment may be constrained by their nature and cannot be released to their fullest extent. Then children’s emotional intelligence, imagination and creativity may develop slowly.
2. Accompanying ≠ Spend a lot of money
Some parents are usually busy with their work and have no time to accompany their children. They think that they should make good [compensation] for their children during holidays and take them to restaurants and large amusement parks.
Of course, it is possible to do so occasionally. If you often spend a lot of money on holidays [compensation], children may begin to be unable to satisfy themselves slowly, want more [advanced] compensation, or propose [compensation] when they develop to normal times.
In fact, the child’s request is not necessarily because he wants to eat a big meal or want big toys, but the parents’ previous behavior gives the child an illusion: [only by asking for a big meal or going to an amusement park can he win the attention of his parents]. This puts the cart before the horse, and may also form the bad habit of children asking for this and that.
Three Ways [Efficient Accompanying]
Accompanying children is not just spending time, energy and money. We need efficient companionship. As long as we master the right method, it takes only half an hour every day to help children establish a sense of security, let them feel the attention and encouragement of their parents, and at the same time, we can also use this opportunity to help children learn new knowledge and skills.
Next, Dr. Clove will introduce three good methods.
Step 1: Eat together
When eating, especially dinner, is a very good time to communicate with each other.
After the baby is 1 year old, he can eat with adults (although he probably won’t eat). Give the child a dining chair alone, and let him sit among adults and eat with adults. Even if there is not much communication, the child will feel the sense of belonging with his parents.
2. Complete one task together every week
Spell a Lego together, make a bread together, make dumplings together, make a pottery together, etc., and give guidance and encouragement to children during the task so that children can learn a skill.
In this process, children will fully feel the support and attention of their parents and have a sense of companionship. This feeling will not take long, but it will be very strong and is a high-quality [nutrition] for children’s hearts.
3. Reading together at night
Since the child is 6 months old, reading before going to bed at night is an excellent opportunity to communicate with the child. From reading before going to bed, we can let the child learn more truth and know more things.
More importantly, before going to bed at night is the time when children are least alert. Lying in the arms of their parents, children can more easily tell their parents what they think during the day, which will make it easier for parents to understand their children’s hearts.