Some readers came to complain to Dr. Clove:
My baby can’t do what for a long time. If this goes on, I’m afraid he can’t concentrate on his studies. How can he cultivate his concentration?
Looking at her anxious face, Dr. Clove thought for a long time and told her the truth:
To improve children’s concentration, parents should be the starting point in many cases.
Because, around a child who is not focused enough, there is often an adult who always disturbs him.
Perhaps some people are very confused:
Six adults in the family turned around a little emperor. They were in great pain. How could they disturb them?
Well, that’s the point. Today, Dr. Clove will tell you about the children’s concentration.
All the stars and the moon hurt the child’s concentration.
Just like Dr. Clove’s reader, many families are surrounded by several adults who are afraid of falling in their hands and melting in their mouths. They are extremely spoiled.
However, this brings about a problem: I always want to give the best to my child and constantly remind him of the splendor and beauty in front of him.
You can think about it, are the following situations very familiar?
The child was doodling when his mother suddenly called him with a bowl: “Baby, this is delicious, come and try it quickly.”
When the child squatted on the ground alone to look at the ants, his father suddenly said, “Baby, this is fun for what, there is a lot of excitement over there, let’s go], and then took the child away.”
These situations are all interruptions to the child’s [concentration], which will damage the child’s ability to maintain attention, regain concentration from interference, and also damage the happiness and satisfaction that the child should have experienced in the process of concentration.
In the long run, it is not surprising that children lack concentration.
However, concentration is related to the baby’s life-long ability and is interlinked in many fields.
As the reader worried at the beginning, the baby could not concentrate on playing with toys when he was young, and his concentration on study and work was likely to be affected when he grew up.
Long-term persistence is based on short-term concentration. When children grow up, the success of many things depends on long-term persistence, such as writing a book, running a business and raising a child.
Because parents’ love interrupts their children’s concentration and affects their children’s life, I believe all parents do not want to see it.
Every parent should protect their children’s concentration.
Children’s concentration is so precious, so every parent should pay attention to cultivate and protect children’s concentration.
1. When children are focused, they are not easily disturbed.
When a child is concentrating on his own affairs, don’t disturb him easily. This is not only a skill of raising, but also a respect for the child.
We should return the choice and initiative of [being what] to the child, and we should not deprive him of the rare opportunity to enjoy the present.
If you really want to talk to your child, you can try to join him instead of interrupting him.
For example, when a child is drawing, parents can walk over and pick up a paintbrush to draw with the child. In this way, not only will the child’s concentration not be affected, but also the parent-child relationship may be improved.
2. Create a [non-interference space] for children
Whether it is a writing desk, a floor mat or a corner of the attic, it can be used to create a “non-interference space” for children. This space should be as far away from possible interference as possible, such as the crowded porch, TV set, and the kitchen that is prone to smell.
Parents can tell their children that in this space, he can do what he wants to do without interference: playing with toys, reading, painting, and even staring blankly.
And people outside the space should also remind themselves that the child in the [non-interference space] is doing his own thing, and we should not disturb him.
3. If you must interrupt, give the child some time.
Sometimes, the family has to go out, but the child still stays in the [non-interference space] and has no intention of coming out. What should I do?
At this point, you can try [timed call].
The specific operation method is:
Before going out, tell the child verbally about the plan for a while, such as [we will get dressed in ten minutes and then go to Grandma’s house]. At the same time, the timing is ten minutes.
In these ten minutes, children can be prepared to take the initiative to shift their focus, instead of being forced away from their focus by their parents passively.
Ten minutes later, the timer will ring. The bell of the timer will remind the child that it is time to wear clothes. Parents can wait for the child to come and gather by themselves. If the timer rings for a long time, the child still refuses to come out and the parents call the child again, it will not appear particularly sudden.
In this way, the timer acts as a buffer and the child will not be angry because his concentration is suddenly interrupted.
Dr. Clove can understand the parents’ heart of “being good for children everywhere”, but sometimes we also do bad things with good intentions, for example, disturbing our focused children.
Most of the time, what we need to think about is not [what should be given to our children], but [we need to change some what for the sake of our children]. After all, every step of our children’s growth is branded with the marks of their parents.