AuthorCurtilage
In life, there will always be some traces left somewhere by chance.
Just like this fart, it is purely accidental to come to this world. As the saying goes, life is like a fart sound. Those who let it go have no intention and those who hear it have heart.
Source: soogif.com
Adults must take responsibility for their farts.
One careless move will make your fart a blockbuster and be reviled by the world.
Source: See upper left corner
In order to let fart leave your body easily and happily, it will quietly merge with the surrounding air.
Today, I will teach you to put a silent fart gracefully!
Come on, fart.
Source: soogif.com
The root of all farts is:
[Airflow Fast through Narrow Space]
In other words, as long as you limit one of the conditions, you can make a silent fart.
Method 1: Give fart enough space,
The narrower the passage of fart, the higher the tone will be.
Just like when whistling, in order to make the tone higher, we usually purse our mouth smaller.
Mouth is like chrysanthemum. # What seems wrong? #
On the contrary, if you want to reduce the volume, you need to break the chrysanthemum as much as possible and let the fart release as much as possible.
Photo Source: Dr. Clove Design Team
The difficulty lies in how to break it gracefully.
If you sit and pretend to stretch or yawn, fix one buttock first, then lift the other buttock and try your best to open it.
Photo Source: Dr. Clove Design Team
Move your ass unnoticed and you can let your fart go.
If you are standing, there is an object or wall in front of you to lean against.
Hold the wall with one hand, bend the knee of the inner foot forward, and press the body weight on the arm against the wall.
Photo Source: Dr. Clove Design Team
Pouting his buttocks,Rely on the thigh twist in tandem, spread the chrysanthemum, poof…
The movements are smooth and in one go. There is no flaw at all. The posture is charming and handsome!
Source: soogif.com
If you are in an empty place, don’t worry.
Naturally, insert your hands into your back pocket, pretend to take something, and take the opportunity to break your hips…
Photo Source: Dr. Clove Design Team
Remember to leave [the crime scene] as soon as possible so as not to be suspected.
However, most of the time, this fart comes and there is no chance to give you time to prepare.
It doesn’t matter, we still have two ways to deal with the sudden fart.
Method 2: Slow down the flow rate of fart
IfWhat would you do to reduce the whistle?-Just blow slowly.
Similarly, slowing down the flow rate of fart can also reduce the sound of fart.
It is very simple to keep the anal sphincter tense when the fart is about to gush out.
What people say is: clamp the chrysanthemum and hold it back.
Photo Source: Dr. Clove Design Team
Hold on for 10 seconds, and when the fart flow is not so urgent, accumulate thick and thin hair, and slowly release it.
Photo Source: Dr. Clove Design Team
Let the air flow pass by bit by bit, and let the loud fart turn into a silent stuffy fart.
Be careful not to relax at once, otherwise it is likely to cause a serial fart.
Source: soogif.com
If you still think this method is difficult to operate and there is a risk of failure, try the third method.
Simple and easy to operate, which will satisfy you.
Method 3: Hinder the spread of fart
The simplest and cruelest way to reduce whistles is, of course, to cover your mouth directly.
Similarly, in order to make fart sound invisible, you can install a [safety door] for chrysanthemum.
For example, a thick cushion will make you feel at ease to release your fart.
Photo Source: Dr. Clove Design Team
Girls also have natural advantages. During their big aunt, they only need a long enough menstruation towel to be able to feel at ease.
The small menstruation towel, besides being used as an insole, has an excellent fart prevention function of 20 points and is strongly recommended to boys who love fart.
The advantage of this method is that it can not only reduce the sound, but also absorb most of the fart odor.
The only disadvantage may be that it is too strong and easy to collapse excrement.
Source: soogif.com
As an adult who is strict with himself, he will never stop there. There must be a more perfect solution.
Then, welcome to the advanced stage: fart’s perfect solution, giving you the opportunity to challenge yourself.
Method 4: Ultimate trick! Cut off the source of fart
When you realize that you are going to fart, take a deep breath and hold your breath.
Clamp chrysanthemum, remember, clamp chrysanthemum.
Photo Source: Dr. Clove Design Team
Education influences your fart, makes it feel ashamed and suffocates your ileum.
Source: soogif.com
Fart is gradually absorbed by the intestinal wall in the intestinal tract and enters the blood. At this time, your anus will relax.
Congratulations on your success in suppressing your fart!
Source: soogif.com
Absolutely silent, tasteless and pollution-free, the most elegant solution.
But to practice this ultimate trick, you need a strong anal sphincter.
How can we practice a strong anal sphincter?
Amway gives everyone an anus lifting exercise: imagine the feeling of holding your urine, tighten your anus and lift it up for a few seconds, then relax, tighten it again, and practice circularly.
Photo Source: Dr. Clove Design Team
What’s more, the scientific name of the ultimate big move to suppress fart is Schrodinger’s fart.
Because you never know, the fart you suppress back is a fart that does not smell or a fart that does not smell.
A fart is not smelly, and a fart is not smelly.
This fart, like people, also has different personalities.
For example, [protein fart] and [carbohydrate fart] are two completely opposite brothers.
As the name implies, if you eat more protein (meat, eggs and milk), it is easy to put [protein fart]; Eat more carbohydrate (rice, noodles and bread), and it is easy to put [carbohydrate fart].
[Protein Fart], a typical smelly fart does not sound.
The quantity is small, the voice is low, but the taste is extremely smoky.
Photo Source: Dr. Clove Design Team
[Carbohydrate fart], properly sound fart does not stink.
The quantity is large, the sound is easy to shock the four seats, but the taste is not very smelly.
Source: soogif.com
This farting, like life, is a difficult multiple choice question:
See if you want to put a fart that does not smell, or do you want to put a fart that does not smell.
Source: Internet
Fart is a technical job. If you learn these skills, you dare to fart confidently everywhere.
Finally, I wish all of you, all of you can open the sky and fart, and all of you can fart!
This article has been reviewed by Wei Wei, chief physician of Clove Clinic.
Source: soogif.com
Responsibility: Homestead